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I recently had an affair and have asked for a divorce.

Our 3 sons are now adults and are taking their father's side in this divorce.

From there, explore what you would like your relationship to look like from that day on.

I'm guessing you would like to have a solid, healthy, and supportive relationship with them and your grandchildren so don't be afraid to ask for that.

I would encourage you to find it within yourself to not try and come between that relationship.

It will only cause you heartache every time, and in reality, you are putting your husband in an impossible situation by asking him to choose.

What he does with the information and your request is completely up to him then.

It's a risk, but one well worth taking for both of you!

You can write this out in a letter, call him, or make a special trip. And then once you share your heart with you son, I'd encourage you to let him know that the topic is no longer up for discussion.

They won't even give me the opportunity to explain why I left.

I don't want to lose them, but I don't see that giving up my new love and going back will fix anything. Brette's Answer: It is not uncommon for grown children to be upset by a divorce and to blame one parent.

Some of the times the children accept the new relationships - that's what we all hope for.

But sometimes things just don't click and we have to deal with that, too.

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